Comedian Jerrod Carmichael Announces He’s Gay In New HBO Special

Comedian Jerrod Carmichael has announced that he is gay.

The 34-year-old stand-up comes out during his special Jerrod Carmichael: Rothaniel, premiering on HBO April 1.

In the special, directed by Bo Burnham, Carmichael addresses his father’s infidelity as a conduit for discussing his own sexuality. Once the facts about his father were made known, the comedian says he felt burdened.

“I was left alone feeling like a liar because I had a secret—one that I kept from my mother and my father, my family, my friends and you, all of you,” he told the audience, “and the secret is that I’m gay.”

The crowd at New York City’s Blue Note Jazz Club applauded Carmichael’s announcement, as the comedian remained brutally honest about his journey.

“My ego wants to rebel against it,” he says. “I rebelled against it my whole life. I never thought I’d come out. I didn’t think I’d ever, ever come out. At many points I thought I’d rather die than confront the truth of that, to actually say it to people. Because I know it changes some people’s perceptions of me. I can’t control that. I’m from an environment where you’re kind of raised to be a man, whatever that means.”